Let's be real. There is very little relaxation going on when we take our children to the pool. Sure, it sounds like a nice idea. Lying in the lawn chair, sipping a cold drink, all while enjoying my latest read; it doesn't get much better than that! Then we get there and I realize, THERE IS SOMETHING IN THE WATER!
After I have lathered everyone up with sunscreen, set up the pool chairs, and wrangled the pool floaties blowing away, I am ready to relax! That's funny, because as soon as my kids hear me exhale, I swear they can actually hear it, they start in with the, "Mom, watch me! Watch me!" I spend the next thirty-minutes watching them jump in the pool no less than 300 times. I have seen them go forwards, backwards, side-ways, eyes closed, tongue out, left arm up, right arm up, elbows out, elbows in... the possibilities are endless. Believe me. ENDLESS.
After the "show" is over, it looks like I will finally get to relax. My kids are playing together, and I see an opportunity to relax on the obnoxiously big ice cream cone floatie that we brought with us. After all, I almost passed out while trying to blow it up, so I deserve to reap the benefits! Once I not so gracefully make it onto the ice cream cone, I close my eyes and relax (Cue the Jaws music). I have been spotted. They must have sensed my relaxation. My children immediately become little torpedoes, and I am the vessel they are trying to sink. Mission successful. My relaxation swiftly washed away as I was overturned by these determined little missiles. Operation Relaxation was a failure.
On my way back to my chair I may or may not have threatened to pop the obnoxious ice cream cone. Settling back into my chair, I took out my copy of War and Peace and began to read. OK, let's be honest. The book I was actually reading is pictured below.
After I have lathered everyone up with sunscreen, set up the pool chairs, and wrangled the pool floaties blowing away, I am ready to relax! That's funny, because as soon as my kids hear me exhale, I swear they can actually hear it, they start in with the, "Mom, watch me! Watch me!" I spend the next thirty-minutes watching them jump in the pool no less than 300 times. I have seen them go forwards, backwards, side-ways, eyes closed, tongue out, left arm up, right arm up, elbows out, elbows in... the possibilities are endless. Believe me. ENDLESS.
After the "show" is over, it looks like I will finally get to relax. My kids are playing together, and I see an opportunity to relax on the obnoxiously big ice cream cone floatie that we brought with us. After all, I almost passed out while trying to blow it up, so I deserve to reap the benefits! Once I not so gracefully make it onto the ice cream cone, I close my eyes and relax (Cue the Jaws music). I have been spotted. They must have sensed my relaxation. My children immediately become little torpedoes, and I am the vessel they are trying to sink. Mission successful. My relaxation swiftly washed away as I was overturned by these determined little missiles. Operation Relaxation was a failure.
On my way back to my chair I may or may not have threatened to pop the obnoxious ice cream cone. Settling back into my chair, I took out my copy of War and Peace and began to read. OK, let's be honest. The book I was actually reading is pictured below.
Next was every parent's favorite part of pool time; getting the kids out of the water. I always give a five-minute warning that turns into twenty-minutes of me trying not to lose it in front of the other pool goers. Following the the "five-minute" warning comes the falling back into the pool "on accident" portion of the day. This part is my favorite. It then leads to the threatening to leave the kids at the pool part of the day. I like to close with the giving my children the death stare, which is when they finally figure out that I mean business. They are finally out of the water, and we are headed home for an episode of, "Mom, can I have a snack?" staring my children.
Happy Summer, everyone!
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